Bark at This, wagtail.

It was very cold this morning. No one wanted to work out in the yard on a day like this, not fit for man nor beast. I let them hang around the Franklin on an extended break that seemed to last all morning. George and Bill were discussing the intelligence of dogs.
"I had a really smart dog once," said George wistfully. "A golden retreiver. We called him Bowser. You know, I taught that pup to go and fetch the paper."
"No shit!" Bill was clearly impressed. "You mean you could just send him out, so you could stay inside on cold days like this?"
"Yeah, he was a smart little doggie. One problem, though..."
"What?"
"Well, maybe we rewarded him too much when he brought back that paper. Because he wanted to go back out, And after a while I heard barking. I went out to the porch and sure enough, there was a pile of papers. That dog had gone around to the neighbors driveways and got them too."
"What did you do?"
"Well, I had to get dressed and take the papers back. Had to keep the fool dog inside until everyone had brought their papers in. It took almost a year to break him of that training."
"Boy there's a moral there somewhere. said Bill.
Lardass had been listening to the discussion, piped up,"Like the Sourcerer's Apprentice - you were dealing with powers beyond your understanding."
I could see that this was about to devolve into one of those deep philosophical discussions that could take all afternoon,
I interjected, "Hey, did any of you ever notice the difference between the way cats and dogs look at you when you turn up the sound and dance naked in front of them?"
They all just sat and stared at me like I was some kind of weird fuck (just like the cats do).