Singular not plural

6/5/2003

Alas I am the last of the famed Dumpfucks. The other lice-infested creatures have cleaned out their lockers and have gone mincing off to pound their puds somewhere else. Good riddence. They all sucked anyway, like Monica Lewinsky only fatter and more bovine. My stuff was always the best, according to the Fan Mail.
So. I'm just sitting here watching the wheels go round and round. I just had to let it go....
The Late Great DFM

Warning: This dump is subject to closing or evolving without warning. If you have seen the Tremors series, you know what I am talking about.
posted by Dennis at 4:15 PM




6/4/2003
Truth
I am sure Martha Stewart and Sammy Sosa are just the unwitting victims of people who have framed them. And Hillary - why would she lie?
So those nattering naybobs who want to throw merde on our national heroes are just mean spirited pricks.

"At the dump. we stand behind our leading members." I lectured to the group gathered around the TV in the cobhouse.
"Yah, so It's easier to stab them in the back"
"Shut up Lardass before I pop a cap in you ass." I aimed a loaded gun at him with malicious intent. The other dumpfucks scattered like cockroaches.
He shut up. But I pulled the trigger anyway. One. Two. Three. But the caulking gun misfired, and goo shot all over my shoes and pants. I spent the next 20 minutes cleaning sealant off the linolium floor. Veritas.

posted by Dennis at 8:45 PM




5/31/2003
Pococurantism
The denizens of this dump are becoming lazy and fat, if I may say so. There is mental litter everywhere you look. Airborne junk, flying in the brisk breezes of apathy. Plastic bags hooked on chain link fences wave like angry flags. Newspapers scuttle across the tarmac blowing nobody any good news. Aluminum cans and take-out trays clink and clash as they tumble before the east wind. Lordy, what a fucking dump. Someone needs to clean this all up before Jesus returns and condemns us all to perdition.